What I Learnt
Due to being unable to attend class, I caught up using the slides and information Carolyn sent me. Within these texts I:
- Thought about how to complete the field observation online (Likely with youtube and twitter since I know those platforms best)
- Learnt about poster layouts, and decided I definitely wanted to go with that for the assignment
- How to observe for empathy, and the tools that are best to use when observing (ethnography and interviews)
- Learnt about what sorts of interview questions to ask, and the distinction between explorative and empathetic interviews
- Looked at the aspects to best observe when taking field notes
- Learnt about the concept of wicked problems, and how it’s unlikely to solve them.
- Further, I learnt that the goal doesn’t have to be to solve, but instead can be to define the problem and frame it differently
- Thought about the sort of energy I would like to curate when completing an interview.
- Looked at the DTT templates for both explorative and empathetic interviews.
- Started thinking about the sorts of questions I would need to ask for my interviews, with the addition of Carolyn’s helpful input
The slides gave me some much needed guidance, which I appreciated. While checking the emails I received for this class, I realised there was a class activity of doing a toast tutorial. Of course, I used this as an excuse to procrastinate and did it on the computer with a spring in my step.
The Struggle
I’ve honestly been struggling a lot this week. I feel myself falling behind the pace of the class, and no matter how hard I try to keep up, I keep on stumbling. I don’t even work! It doesn’t feel excusable, but I am aware that my disabilities play a significant part in this. Namely, my depression.
I’m a perfectionist, and I have a burning desire to achieve 7’s all around. However, what I’m capable of doing often falls short due to a) my complete lack of energy due to my major depressive disorder and all of the side effects associated with the medication; and b) my frustrating inability to focus on writing something for longer than 10 minutes without wanting to pull my teeth out.
It’s something that has caused me alot of pain in the past, resulting in assignments that would be done within the last 3 days before it was due. I’m at a different stage in my life now though, with some understanding of the value of time management, so knowing that I have all the tools to do something phenomenal but my brain is actively working against me is an upsetting concept to come to terms with.
There is a freedom in catagorising yourself as lazy and dumb, since it doesn’t require any further introspection. It’s a personality trait, a scapegoat. Knowing, however, that you are perfectly capable of completing well done, intelligent, polished work, but instead are being held back by a massive handicap? It feels deeply disappointing.
Regardless, I’m on the corner of struggle street and depression episode avenue. To cope, I’m doing research up the wazoo and planning an online survey in case I can’t do more than 2 interviews. I really want to nail this assignment, since it’s a topic that I’m interested in, but I need to set my sights more on the goal of passing. If I do that, there’s less of a chance of me burning out and having a suicidal ideation episode.
Researching
For research, I’ve come to the conclusion that i wanted to focus on parasociability and socially isolated individuals. I quickly realised, however, a more interesting sub-concept is parasociability and Neurodiverse (ND) people; ND people being those who have Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and/or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), which are developmental conditions that affect every aspect of that person’s life (Speaking as an individual with ADHD, with a loving girlfriend who has ASD, and all my friends having ASD and/or ADHD purely by coincidence).
With that in mind, I constructed the mind map below:
Here is a page of notes I took while researching for this concept, specifically in regards to loneliness:
With a clear path now set for me, I feel I have settled on a problem statement that I have a decent number of sources on:
Neurodiverse people (ADHD, ASD) are susceptible to pathological parasociability due to loneliness from social incompatibility, and a significant fear of rejection.
I feel some confidence in researching this topic, since I can learn a little more about myself along the way. Fingers crossed I can keep myself on track!
Here is the weekly cute video! This time, it’s Minerva! I am hoping to get a therapy dog this year, and I hope they are as head empty as she is :D
See ya!
-Ollie
